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Ljubljana Cricket Club -> Ljubljana Cricket Club Forum -> Commentators, pundits, writers you love and hate
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joel


Findin' Fundin

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Commentators, pundits, writers you love and hate
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I've been reminded to start this thread by the oleaginous presence of Mark Nicholas in the commentary box. Is there a more annoying dip****? He sounds like a Premiership commentator, all portentous "I'll tell you what" Hampshire man yacht pub bollocks.

I like Atherton, Holding, David Lloyd makes me laugh, Nasser's a bit meh.

Your goods and bads?

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paichukka


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Grrrrrr. Public-school ponce Nicholas makes me want to initiate bloody revolution. Off with their heads etc.

He's up the arse of everybody. He'll never say a bad word against anybody. Except maybe the ICC and "foreigners".

"Oh and that's edged between first and second slip, a magnificent ball, but you have to say he played it cleverly, blah, blah, blah"

Thumbs up to: Tony Greig, for reliably but enthusiastically making a tit of himself; Geoffrey, for reliably being a moaning tyke at a very high pitch; Geoffrey's granny, who was a fair player by all accounts; Athers, mostly, for giving just a bit of insight in rather a low key; Michael Oldin', Michael Slater, Tony Cozier, Mark Taylor, and of course the master himself, Benaud.

Tolerable: Beefy, Hughes, CMJ

Annoying: Allott, Willis, Lawry, Hussain, Thorpey, Gower, Raja, Thommo, Illott

Really annoying: Lloyd, Walker


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El Treasurorio


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Am with the chukka of pie.

Nicholas is a pretentious twit, rubbish at commentary, however, as an anchorman, he's probably a good choice. Mind you, I quite like a bit of C. Colville to anchor my cricket viewing. Much better than that second rate 6th form college student they give the boring matches that Sky have picked up in their package.

In all honesty, Boycott, tyke that he is, is the best commentator when an inside knowledge is wanted. Despite his belligerent comments, and his lunatic but amusing references to Mrs. Boycott senior, he really does know his stuff more than anybody else (except for a Mr. R. Benaud).
When an amusing villiage idiot aspect is required, and one that you can put up with, then D. Lloyd is your man. Allott provides something similar, but in a way that makes the audience think why is this villiage idiot trying to talk posh and intellectual.
Beefy, great player as he was, still shows why he should never have been captain with his constant tactical gaffs. Athers is a boring **** who never seems to have anything interesting or positive to say, while his captaining replacement Hussain is much of a muchness.
Greig gets my vote too. Highly charged at times, he provides a good middle ground to Lawry and Benaud. I also like N. Knight, but that's only 'cos I played with him once...

-- Edited by El Treasurorio at 08:57, 2007-03-30

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paichukka


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El Treasurorio wrote:

 I also like N. Knight, but that's only 'cos I played with him once...

Was that in some kind of Posh XI? Revival of the "Gentlemen"?



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El Treasurorio


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paichukka wrote:

El Treasurorio wrote:  I also like N. Knight, but that's only 'cos I played with him once...Was that in some kind of Posh XI? Revival of the "Gentlemen"?


Nope. We were both Granta players at Cambridge in our youth. Although not often, he played for us when he could be arsed, luckily once was when I was playing. He was rather good he was.



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Muppet


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I'm not Smoothie Nicholas's biggest fan, but I don't mind him that much. He always shows himself to be genuinely enthusiastic about the game. That's why I don't mind Blofeld, because his love for what he does overrides his comedy value.

Love Boycott, Benaud and Greig. More of them please.
Can tolerate Aggers but CMJ and Simon Mann are dull. Athers, Arlo White and David Lloyd all have "hard-to-take-seriously" accents.
Love most West Indian commentators, especially Holding and "the Bish", but Colin Croft is annoying.
For the Aussies, Bill Lawrie, Michael Slater and Kerry O'Keeffe do it for me (non-sexually). Dean Jones is just tiresome though.
Kiwis: Iron Smuth yes, Jeremy Coney yes, "Sir" Richard Hadlee no.
Indian/Pakistani commentators are generally very tedious, except possibly Sanjay Manjrekar and Ramiz Raja.

I've got a further question - who would you most like to see commentating on cricket? Anyone at all, from any walk of life.
Charlotte Church, anyone? biggrin

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El Presidente


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Muppet wrote:


I've got a further question - who would you most like to see commentating on cricket? Anyone at all, from any walk of life.
Charlotte Church, anyone? biggrin

I don't know why I thought of this but I reckon Billy Bragg would be a great cricket commentator. Highbrow articulate observations with just the odd hint of a "bollocks" or 2. Mind you, he probably hates cricket.



-- Edited by El Presidente at 10:44, 2007-03-30

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paichukka


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Mick Jagger and Ron Wood*

That Norwegian bloke who did the original "your boys"

Sir Viv, with Beefy, and perhaps a ressurected Sylvester Clarke

Barry Davies

Townes van Zandt

Sun Tzu

Brian Clough

A gaggle of fit French actresses to anchor the thing (Adjani, Jacob, Beart, Marceau et al)

And of course the Test Match Special Needs group of Golcar, Joel, Club Dogsbody, El Treasurorio and yours truly. Brilliant, analytical, incisive drinking, with a bit of commentary and snack consumption thrown in, broadcasting to the world from Poljane. An idea ahead of its time...

Tim Rice not allowed anywhere near this enterprise.



*Note: Me mate spoke to Ron Wood yesterday about organising an exhibition of his paintings here. Got the go-ahead, and then realised he hasn't the faintest idea how to do it...

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El Presidente


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paichukka wrote:
And of course the Test Match Special Needs group of Golcar, Joel, Club Dogsbody, El Treasurorio and yours truly. Brilliant, analytical, incisive drinking, with a bit of commentary and snack consumption thrown in, broadcasting to the world from Poljane. An idea ahead of its time...


 cry - Have I pissed in your cornflakes recently or something?


Good luck to your mate re Ronnie Wood by the way



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a batsman who hits a lot of slogs. Derogatory.
paichukka


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You're only allowed in the team if the Aussies promise to start losing again. Cue Shane Bond...

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Golcar CC


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Jacob's Swiss, so unlike Beart and Adjani will have very little knowledge of cricket.

As for Brad, he's a good man, but may have spent too much time with whinging Poms - he could've lost his Aussie edge.

Tony Grieg has to be on the team if only for his often-copied, well-remembered "Not Bad" comment as the camera swept the stands and focused on the pair of a pair of scantily clad woman.

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El Presidente


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By the way I can't find any way of merging threads like you can in other forums, but this topic has appeared before

earlier thread on same subject

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a batsman who hits a lot of slogs. Derogatory.
Muppet


Je suis l'état et l'état c'est moi

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paichukka wrote:
Tim Rice not allowed anywhere near this enterprise.
Damn right. Or John Major.



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Luxury


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Muppet wrote:


Indian/Pakistani commentators are generally very tedious, except possibly Sanjay Manjrekar and Ramiz Raja.
Muppet, that can't go unchallenged? Ramiz Raja is a blithering idiot, the worst of the lot.



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joel


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Benaud of course is the master, retired though he is.

Did anyone else used to enjoy the dulcet tones of Jim Laker?

Although, if we're talking the 70s and 80s, and anchormen, Peter West used to give me the creeps. He had something of the sadistic South African policeman about him.

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Golcar CC


Bezalgo

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Didn't Benaud just retire from English duties? I thought he was still going...


Jim Laker Way in Shipley - I used to run past the little road they named after him in his home town (stroke village) when I lived in the North of Engerland last.

Major Man. And people in Shipley to this day recall the man with immense pride and pleasure.

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