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joel


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Well, kickoff in a bit and there's a thumping on the cards.

How did England get into a position where, if they beat Sri Lanka, it'll be the shock of the Super 8s?

It's also very annoying to hear Vaughan saying that England are a good team "when we turn up and play", as reported in cricinfo today. Anyone wanting an example of the arrogance of English sportsmen from any of the major sports should look no further.

-- Edited by joel at 13:20, 2007-04-04

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El Presidente


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Mahmood earned these accolades at the start of the innings on the BBC

"Mahmood: All the consistency of my dear old mum's gravy."

"Contrary to Simon Mann, I believe that somewhere within Mahmood is a decent plumber trapped in a county cricketer's whites."

"Hmmm. If there really is a decent cricketer 'rattling around' inside Mahmood, it can only be because he has eaten one...Alan Lamb perhaps?"

Also nice that he took 4 for 50 and has made them eat their words today, but some fine sledging from the readers of the BBC coverage anyway.

Meanwhile Anderson has taken sod-all wickets all tournament and escaped any criticism (the useless dough merchant)

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El Presidente


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Cracking match that. Sad to see there had to be a loser. I still think England will beat Sth Africa, but I won't be supporting you on Sunday I'm afraid.


In other news.

Stuart Broad now in the 15 to replace Jon Lewis. That won't make a difference, but it is time to ressurcect Andrew Strauss at Joyce's expense one feels. Dalrymple might as well go home too ater today's effort by Bopara.
Greg Chappell quits as Indian coach.

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Golcar CC


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Disappointing. Is it bowlers that win matches, or boundaries?

Bell was unlucky, but KP was caught out again before the job was done. Nixon and Bopara did a pretty good.

Oh Dear!

I think Eng v Aus is Saturday Presedujejoi

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One over in England's innings was 5 balls instead of 6.

Where's the video ref etc for that?

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joel


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Interview with Paul Nixon in today's Guardian.

Like the first line: 'Paul Nixon is a man who could carry off a stirring pep-talk in the bowels of hell'

biggrin

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joel


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And this:

'It was an interesting day for the banter,' said Nixon. 'The umpires had a chat with Michael Vaughan after 15 overs for the amount of stick that was flying around and, when I walked to the crease, I think that was about as much abuse as I've had from any team.'


I'm beginning to warm to him...

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paichukka


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Well Sangak is a legendary busy bollocks. A keeper and a lawyer I believe...

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El Presidente


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paichukka wrote:

Well Sangak is a legendary busy bollocks. A keeper and a lawyer I believe...

 Is "busy bollocks" a euphamism for "foul-mouthed nasty sledger"?

 



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joel


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South Africa ownèd to death. Hahahahahaha.

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paichukka


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Gives England a chance too. But Bangla might well win another match at some point...

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El Presidente


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Time to make Collingwood captain and banish Vaughan and Anderson.

Tough luck with Pietersen's catch. Excellent effort. Great catch. Tough decision.

Did I mention that Anderson is useless?

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joel


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Banish is a good word.

Btw, if anyone's tempted to listen to the Guardian podcast, think twice. There's no one quite as ****ing embarassingly chipper and empty-headed as Rob Curling. Except perhaps M**k Ni****as.

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joel


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Reading around the articles in today's papers, I'm beginning to feel very sorry for Kevin Pietersen. Damned if he does, damned if he doesn't. How else is he supposed to bat if your 2, 3, 5 and 6 fail when setting a target, and you have in the back of your mind the toothlessness of your bowling?

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El Presidente


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joel wrote:

Reading around the articles in today's papers, I'm beginning to feel very sorry for Kevin Pietersen. Damned if he does, damned if he doesn't. How else is he supposed to bat if your 2, 3, 5 and 6 fail when setting a target, and you have in the back of your mind the toothlessness of your bowling?

 Plus, thinking about it a bit more - that catch was freakishly good and his effort to stay in the field remarkable. However, Symonds got 2 runs for it.

 



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joel


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El Presidente wrote:


Plus, thinking about it a bit more - that catch was freakishly good and his effort to stay in the field remarkable. However, Symonds got 2 runs for it. 

It was a remarkable piece of athleticism, especially for a bloke as big as Pietersen.

 



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paichukka


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Wankers. Wankers. Wankers. Anybody criticising KP is a complete and utter nicholas. He's carrying this team, and some people want to have a pop.

Monty and Freddie can bowl. KP can bat. Colli can often do both. Bopara and Nixon are doing about as much as they can too. But the rest are bobbins.

Personally I think Vaughan might be worth his place as a bowler, but he should bat at eight or so.

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joel


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paichukka wrote:

Wankers. Wankers. Wankers. Anybody criticising KP is a complete and utter nicholas. He's carrying this team, and some people want to have a pop.

Monty and Freddie can bowl. KP can bat. Colli can often do both. Bopara and Nixon are doing about as much as they can too. But the rest are bobbins.

Personally I think Vaughan might be worth his place as a bowler, but he should bat at eight or so.
That might be a solution to the Vaughan problem.

Don't forget to include Bell in the pluses. I know your feelings about the man, but he was very good yesterday.

 



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El Presidente


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Sweariest players within audible proximity of stump microphone = Ireland.

They may be the sweariest, but they are playing really good cricket. Coming into the World Cup as the 15th ranked team, they certainly haven't played like it. New Zealand struggling a little.

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joel


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El Presidente wrote:

Sweariest players within audible proximity of stump microphone = Ireland.


Online viewing's a real eyeopener. You hear everything biggrin

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paichukka


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Good knock from AD de V this, given that he's hit all his big shots on one leg...

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El Presidente


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After watching Shaun Pollock bowl today the question entered my mind -

"Is there anything sadder on a cricket field than watching a pace bowler who has slowed down in the twilight of his career?"

McGrath, Pollock, Vaas and Kallis all trundle in now, where they used to terrify. There's something rather "English-seaside-town-sad" about the spectacle. Anyone else agree?

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brazo de natillas


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El Presidente wrote:

"Is there anything sadder on a cricket field than watching a pace bowler who has slowed down in the twilight of his career?"


The 30W glimmer of palm-thumping hope as Ljubljana take an earlyish wicket protecting a total of 76?

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El Presidente


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brazo de natillas wrote:

El Presidente wrote:"Is there anything sadder on a cricket field than watching a pace bowler who has slowed down in the twilight of his career?"
The 30W glimmer of palm-thumping hope as Ljubljana take an earlyish wicket protecting a total of 76?

 biggrin

Oh God. What a thoroughly depressing scenario I've been greeted with upon opening this thread this morning. As possibly the most frequent spectator of the above scenario, I may retreat into bed for the next 5 years a la Brian Wilson, unable to deal with reality.



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paichukka


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Wank fielding from England. Vaughan is a spaz in the field really, isn't he.

Loving the Bangla cries of "shabbash" from the stump mike. Ah, memories...

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brazo de natillas


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El Presidente wrote:
Oh God. What a thoroughly depressing scenario I've been greeted with upon opening this thread this morning. As possibly the most frequent spectator of the above scenario, I may retreat into bed for the next 5 years a la Brian Wilson, unable to deal with reality.
I'll prepare the sandbox and the therapeutic ear candles.

 



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paichukka


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Shane Bond can bowl, can't he?

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El Presidente


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Anyone else think that New Zealand kit looks bloody uncomfortable in that heat?

South Africa don't really look like being able to win this World Cup now. I think we've got our Glod, Silver and Bronze sorted. Just need to see if Sth Africa can limp into 4th place.

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El Presidente


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Nice to see some vibe in the crowd too. That's what a West Indies match should sound like, trumpets, whistles, cowbells, cavorting etc.

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Muppet


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Good to see some decent runs being posted by Sri Lanka against the Aussie attack.
Not sure they're scoring quick enough to post a threatening enough total, though.
Interesting decision to leave Murali out. I can see that they may want to rest some key players given that their place in the semi-finals is assured, but I wouldn't leave ANYONE out against the Aussies, least of all the world's best spinner.



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Great.
I post a pro-SL comment, they promptly lose FIVE quick wickets. I mean...



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El Presidente


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Muppet wrote:

 

Great.
I post a pro-SL comment, they promptly lose FIVE quick wickets. I mean...

 



That was a mighty fine "Joao Pinto" I must say. ("that Joao Pinto can't head for toffee..." Back of the net from 30 off his head about 2 seconds later)

 It must be noted that Nathan Bracken is having a dream World Cup without getting much attention, from his 7 matches he has taken 14 wickets for 182 runs, with an economy rate of 3.32, strike rate of 23.4 balls and an average of 13.00.

Extraordinary figures really, without much praise at all. The silent assassin?



-- Edited by El Presidente at 18:50, 2007-04-16

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El Presidente


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There's something you don't see very often in international cricket. Michael Clarke just hit a ball for 4, but we have a  "lost ball."

Priceless.
 

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joel


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El Presidente wrote:

 

Extraordinary figures really, without much praise at all. The silent assassin?

 


He doesn't get much attention because he's got girly hair and looks like Robbie Savage.

 



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BBC is reporting a story about the Seth Efricans being out on the razzle a few days ago, in a sort of anything-Fred-can-do-we-can-do-better-is-it? kind of a way. I'm sort of hoping that that might in some way put them at a disadvantage for this afternoon's "crunch encounter", but then, well, if I see a straw I do tend to clutch it.
I think it really could go either way this afternoon. Them South Africans are so unpredictable. Hopefully the crappier version will turn up and we'll have a game, and England will have a chance, especially if our bowlers keep it fast and straight. I fear we're largely in Freddie and Mahmood's hands on this pitch.
Otherwise, we're condemned to looking back on a tournament where the highest ranked team we beat was Bangladesh.

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England win toss and chose to bat.

Who the **** with?!?!?!?!

"We're all doomed"

frasiermainpic.jpg



-- Edited by El Treasurorio at 14:40, 2007-04-17

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paichukka


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Vaughan. Cack. As ever.

Anybody got sopcast or something on the go? I've buried with work at the moment, so I need some more distraction...

At least KP is in, as I always say in this situation.

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paichukka


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Did Vaughan do that thing where he takes the helmet and gloves off, angles his head down and wipes the very few beads of sweat from his brief stay at the crease into his remaining hair as he trudges off? 'Cause he does every time.

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El Presidente


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check that real player link. If not go on that forum and follow the latest tips. I got a few things working yesterday through following the advice on there (through IE only though)


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Muppet


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paichukka wrote:
At least KP is in, as I always say in this situation.
I'll see you the KP comment... and raise you "At least we've still got Nixon to come".



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paichukka


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Anyone got a sopcast of paint drying that I can watch instead of this England willow-wafting?

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El Presidente


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OK. So I have said some harsh things about Anderson in the past (and probably Mahmood too). Now's the time to prove me wrong Jimmy. (Sorry can't ever support Sth Africa - C'mon England)

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paichukka


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Pah. No chance. How many overs to spare for the victory?

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paichukka


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Fair chuckling at this ineptitude. SA to win in the 28th over.

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paichukka


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Man, that was one of the all-time shellackings. Tomatoes at the airport time?

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Muppet


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Love this comment about the CWC from a BBC contributor today:
"Other than the absence of two of Pakistan's key players, the ridiculous schedule, poor quality pitches, unfinished stadia, largely empty stands, dearth of exciting matches, inept performances by the two best-supported teams, rip-off hotel prices and as yet unexplained death of one of the coaches, it's been a total success."

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paichukka


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But the semis should be pretty good. At least it's the right teams.

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El Presidente


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You'd have to say that Matthew Hayden is in a bit of reasonable form at the moment. His 3rd century of the tournament so far, and they've been against New Zealand, West Indies and a world record fastest one against Sth Africa (not to mention 181 v New Zealand in January)

He says as he severely Joao Pinto's him into getting dismissed.....

-- Edited by El Presidente at 17:03, 2007-04-20

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El Presidente wrote:

You'd have to say that Matthew Hayden is in a bit of reasonable form at the moment. His 3rd century of the tournament so far, and they've been against New Zealand, West Indies and a world record fastest one against Sth Africa (not to mention 181 v New Zealand in January)

He says as he severely Joao Pinto's him into getting dismissed.....

-- Edited by El Presidente at 17:03, 2007-04-20


Absolutely, it's hats off to the big lump .. nearly 600 runs in the WC, when everyone had him as washed up not so long ago.

Good work at the end by the supposedly useless Watson. Meanwhile Brad's bunny continues his poor form against aging Ozzie legends, and the RUS has stepped up to the ol'popper, and while he's there i'm backing the Kiwis, every last man jack of 'em. As long as the RUS does what the RUS can do, of course.
Anyone see what Surrey are up to?

Ahhhh **** I've stymied the RUS with a big ol' JaoPinto... there he goes

well that's that - well done Australia.

 



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El Presidente


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Golcar CC wrote:

 

El Presidente wrote:

You'd have to say that Matthew Hayden is in a bit of reasonable form at the moment. His 3rd century of the tournament so far, and they've been against New Zealand, West Indies and a world record fastest one against Sth Africa (not to mention 181 v New Zealand in January)

He says as he severely Joao Pinto's him into getting dismissed.....






Ahhhh **** I've stymied the RUS with a big ol' JaoPinto... there he goes


 

 



 A double Pinto. I will give now give no more praise to any players on this thread. Munich v Ljubljana tomorrow for anyone who's slightly interested.



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